Dog Willies - When they get stuck
Updated: Mar 29
Dogs willies! Well they are just part of the job.
And yes I do call them willies, I should probably be more professional and say the p word, but I just don’t like using it!
Here is my willy story, I have told it before but not in detail...
One Saturday night I was working full pelt, unblocking cat bladders, treating patients in hospital and performed a surgery or two (all who recovered). Then comes the phone call - my dogs willy is out (I think the owner used the word penis but let’s forget that small matter). Ok how long has it been out for? About an hour.
Well this is supposed to be a funny story but let me take you back 6 years before this nights event.
A young sight hound presented to the charity clinic I worked in having had his willy out for 2 days! The smell filled the waiting room, the owner was aggressive towards us and the young dog, around 18 months was distressed and in pain.
The outcome was that the dog needed his willy amputated, the tissue had died and we had to turn him into a girl. My great vet friend did the surgery (he’s one amazing clever and compassionate vet). With the news their male dog could no longer reproduce, he was dumped at the clinic. He found a lovely home and I’m glad he was left. Who lets their dog suffer that pain for 48 hours or perhaps more? Entitled to free vet care and didn’t ask for help immediately! Well that lovely boy, now with girlie bits leads a lovely life.
Anyway back to the story in hand!
Ok have you tried dunking his will in sugary water and using Vaseline to push it back in. I’ll try that now the owner said. 10 minutes later - that willy isn’t budging, the owner had called back. Come on down I say! Ok I’m crazy busy but can juggle, vets were designed to juggle multiple cases and still give them the best care. So down comes the lab with his willy stuck out. Reception call some 10-15 minutes later, he’s arrived. I’d already set up possible sedation, lubricated warm water, pain relief etc etc, it’s what you do. Get ready! I walk into the waiting room and approach the owner and dog with his willy out!! Ok lets go through to the consulting room and I’ll take a look. This lovely pooch stands up, takes one look at me and that willy shoots straight back in to where it should be . No consult or treatment needed!! This is great for the owner - no cost involved Great for the dog - no treatment needed Bad for my self esteem - am I that scary and or unattractive?
So the moral of the story is, if your dogs willy is out, just show them a picture of me! I’m confident it’ll go back in (actually do try sugary water as that can really help!)